You set yourself up for happiness, you set yourself up for sadness, either way it's your doing.

Where do I begin?
This past week has been stressful to say the least.
I've been thrown every curveball possible.
Apparently, I'm still standing. Although I don't know how.

Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it.

You should never give yourself a chance to fall apart because, when you do, it becomes a tendency and it happens over and over again. You must practice staying strong, instead. -Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love

Remember sadness is always temporary. This, too, shall pass. -Chuck Falcon

The world breaks us all. Afterward, some are stronger at the broken places. -Hemingway

Tat my name on you.. so I know it's real..

It's been one of those weeks..well actually it's been one of those months. I've been dealing with a lot but I'm trying to do my best to deal with it all.

25 Things You Didn't Know About Me..Until NOW! :)

1. I'm totally addicted to coffee, I feel like I can't go a day without it or I'll be unable to function.

2. I just recently got into Sour Patch Kids..but I won't eat the yellow or green ones (which means my fiance is forced to..he's not a fan of this! lol)

3. I'm somewhat obsessed with zebra print..I have everything from duct tape ..pens..frying pans..and pj pants..

4. I could watch any episode of FRIENDS over and over again and never get tired of it.

5. I'm a very nervous passenger in a car.. I try to keep myself busy so it doesn't bother me.

6. I'm terrified of bridges..I give myself a panic attack almost everytime I have to go over a large one.

7. I love to read..almost anything on any subject and if I really enjoy the book, I'll read it over and over.

8. My guilty pleasure is the Kardashians- I watch the shows..read the blogs..read the gossip magazines..I LOVE them.

9. One of my goals in life is to learn how to make my own cupcakes and icing from scratch..and have it taste great!

10. I'm a very stubborn person and unfortunately this causes me to hold grudges and not be able to let go easily.

11. At first I come off very shy and sometimes cold but once I get to know you, I open up and you won't be able to shut me up!

12. The beach is my absolute favorite place- I feel like it's my therapist..once I spend anytime with my feet in the sand, my world feels complete.

13. I listen to all types of music- I relate to lyrics more than anything.

14. I LOVE food.. but I'm a terrible cook. I can bake and make a few certain dishes but I usually leave that up to my fiance.

15. I feel like a hug can cure almost anything.

16. My goal in life is to become a mother, I'm currently a step-mother and I adore it but I sometimes feel like its a thankless job.

17. I think that tattoos and piercings are one the sexiest physical traits a man can have ..and my fiance has both!!

18. I'm terrified of needles but I tolerate them due to my diabetes..

19. I have to sleep with one leg out of the blanket.

20. I'm completely blind without my contacts.

21. My eyes are my favorite feature- alot of people think my eye color is due to my contacts but they aren't tinted or colored-- the blue is ALL me.

22. I can't stand bananas-- not the smell..taste..texture.. NOTHING to do with them.

23. I will dip just about anything in RANCH. I often rate the quality of a restuarant based on the quality of their ranch.

24. I cannot stand tomatoes-- but i love ketchup..bbq sauce..and spaghetti.

25. I'm an extremely loyal person and i give second chances but hurt me more than once and I'll never trust you again..

Music is the bonding factor between pain and happiness..

We all stub our toes, we all have people who don't love us enough. There are all kinds of suffering; life is a bunch of suffering. There are a lot of other things too, of course, but we all suffer.

Just because today is a terrible day doesn't mean tomorrow might not be the best day of your entire life. You just have to wake up and get there. -Pete Wentz

You wanna know what living life to the fullest actually is? It's waking up on a Monday morning with no complaints. It's knowing you always deserve to laugh. It's doing what feels right no matter what. It's doing what you want to, no matter how stupid you look. It's about being yourself, cause no one can tell you you're doing it wrong.

You can tell a lot about a person by the way he handles four things: a rainy day, the elderly, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.

Happy Friday!

How does anyone know when to keep going and when to just let go?

It's one of those days..when I feel like all I want to do is go back to bed..or wonder why I got out of bed in the first place? I'm just so down and in a funk and I really don't know how to snap out of it. I'm tired of trying so hard to be happy and to make everyone around me happy.. I want someone to ask me if i'm okay..listen to me when I say " Yes..." and realize..wait..that's not true. I want someone to make me talk about all the things I worry about and think about and not think that I'm crazy or overreacting or that it's stupid. I want, I want , I want but why can't I ever have?!

I don’t pretend to know what love is for everyone, but I can tell you what it is for me. Love is knowing all about someone, and still wanting to be with them more than any other person. Love is trusting them enough to tell them everything about yourself, including the things you might be ashamed of. Love is feeling comfortable and safe with someone, but still getting weak knees when they walk into a room and smile at you. -The OC

What now?

I feel myself getting to my breaking point. I tend to keep everything bottled up inside because I don't want to bother anyone with my problems. I figure.."everyone you meet is facing their own battle" so why should I feel like my battle is significant? I mean.. I'm alive. That's got to count for something. I miss my grandfather daily..he was the light in my life when everything went dim. I miss my grandmother..and she's been gone for years now. I mean, do you ever really get over the loss of someone who is important to your happiness? I just don't understand. I feel like the world would be a much brighter place if some of those people survive..but I didn't. I mean is that morbid? Sometimes it feels true.

And all she wants is someone to be afraid of losing her.

one of those days...when someone else's words say it better..

i feel like the squirrels that so often run in front of our car
& then stand paralyzed in the forward crunch of the tires
i’m torn between the compulsion to run
& the urge to stand still & hope the danger will pass
-Koren Zailckas, Smashed

Change; we don't like it, we fear it, but we can't stop it from coming. We either adapt to change or we get left behind. And it hurts to grow, anybody who tells you it doesn't is lying. But heres the truth: the more things change, the more they stay the same. And sometimes, oh, sometimes change is good. Oh, sometimes change is everything.- Grey's Anatomy

People are stupid and just want to be loved. That's the only reason anyone does anything ...